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The bad pun thread


05pearl

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Man who stick head in bowl of punch will surly get punch in nose.

 

Man who farts in church will surly sit in his own pew.

 

New corduroy pillow is making headlines

 

Took my cat to the vet to get a cat scan.

 

Took my dog to the vet to get a lab report.

 

Politics me off.

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Lots of these were told to me by my mom as "confucious says" jokes from her child hood. The one that I always remember was "Woman who stands on head has crack up".

 

Some other corny ones:

 

 

Grease monkey who go to bed without bathing wake up oily in the morning.

Man who run in front of car get tired.

Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

Baseball is wrong - man with four balls cannot walk.

War doesn't determine who is right, war determines who is left.

Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.

Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

It take many nails to build crib but one screw to fill it.

Man who drive like hell bound to get there.

Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.

Man who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs.

Don't eat the snow where the huskies go!

Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!

Man who lose key to apartment not get new key.

He who sitteth on an upturned tack shall surely rise.

Even the greatest of whales is helpless in middle of desert.

Man who sit on tack get point!

Man who jumps off cliff, jumps to conclusion!

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