ehsnils Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control. And many more from: http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/ Another thing: Go to Google and seach "find chuck norris" (no quotes) and click on the first link. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilverLeg Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 I love these, always get a good chuckle when readin them.. The best part of waking up, is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lawl Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 is the time zone about 2 years behind in sweden? huckabee tried the norris thing in the primaries and failed miserably. that ship has sailed. car for sale. PM me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SubiGT Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Hey lawl, if Obama wins, he'll make it Canada here. Many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkLegacy Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkLegacy Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilverLeg Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Chuck Norris is responsible for China's over-population. He hosted a Karate tournament in Beijing and all women within 1,000 miles became pregnant instantly Chuck Norris once pulled out a single hair from his beard and skewered three men through the heart with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SubiGT Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 If you have 5 dollars, and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, Chuck Norris has more money then you. Hey SilverLeg, "It rubs the lotion on it's skin, it does this whenever it is told" Many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilverLeg Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 If you have 5 dollars, and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, Chuck Norris has more money then you. Hey SilverLeg, "It rubs the lotion on it's skin, it does this whenever it is told" Don't you hurt my precious ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Philadelphias Worst Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse in the face, now we call it a giraffe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkLegacy Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkLegacy Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Chuck Norris eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilverLeg Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Chuck Norris once created a flamethrower by urinating into a lighter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garandman Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 (edited) When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. When a Chuck Norris movie was first aired in France, they surrendered. Edited October 29, 2008 by Garandman Who Dares Wins スバル Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkLegacy Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is "Charles". Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he exploded. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Irrational Exuberance Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 chuck norris once walked down a crowded street with an erection.... ....there were no survivors. "i like my women the way i like terrorists... ...screaming gods name and ready to explode." http://img255.imageshack.us/img255/5479/troy3nu5.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dudeondacouch Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 When Chuck Norris works out, the machines get stronger. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xclomo Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Chuck Norris can edit PDF files Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reuben Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 Chuck Norris once had a staring competition with the sun. He won. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
absolutsnwbrdr Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 Chuck Norris can edit PDF files http://www.altek.ca/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/lolz-you-fail.jpg ...so can anyone with acrobat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
absolutsnwbrdr Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilverLeg Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 http://www.altek.ca/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/lolz-you-fail.jpg ...so can anyone with acrobat Acrobat Professional that is, which is a bit pricey for the home user. I laughed when I read that one, b/ editing acrobat is a bit*% Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilverLeg Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 Chuck Norris' sperm can be seen with the naked eye. Each one is the size of a quarter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmp Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 spec.B is the only Noun authorized to stand-in for "Chuck Norris" on those facts. SOLD | '06 spec.B - VF52/AVO/740cc/Up/Down | 238awhp | 50-80mph 3.1 seconds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilverLeg Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 Chuck Norris eats lightning and farts thunder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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