The Parenthood Thread

[05GT Guru]

In other parenthood news...

 

My daughter and I had a blast this weekend hanging out with my friends and other kids her age over the Memorial Day weekend. We all spent the weekend at a friends beach house with a number of other couples and their kids.

 

Since we were all in the same house and did the same activities, it was the first time I was really able to focus on seeing each of the parents personalities and how it's reflected in their kid both negative and positive.

 

It is always interesting to see how other children are and the be able to see the parenting that has molded them. I have two good friends who also have children who play with my oldest quite often. Our parenting styles differ in many ways.

[JermTheElf]

I flushed some children down my toilet this morning

[PeterJMC]

It is always interesting to see how other children are and the be able to see the parenting that has molded them. I have two good friends who also have children who play with my oldest quite often. Our parenting styles differ in many ways.

 

I did feel bad for this one boy. He was about 2.5 yrs old and his parents told him on many occasions to "man up". I organized a small group of kids and one of their parents to get ice cream one evening after dinner, his parent often walked ahead of him (5-10 feet) apparently too impatient to walk as slow as him.

 

The kid was definitely the least happiest of the bunch.

[KartRacerBoy]

I flushed some children down my toilet this morning

 

A teenager, I hope.

[05GT Guru]

I did feel bad for this one boy. He was about 2.5 yrs old and his parents told him on many occasions to "man up". I organized a small group of kids and one of their parents to get ice cream one evening after dinner, his parent often walked ahead of him (5-10 feet) apparently too impatient to walk as slow as him.

 

The kid was definitely the least happiest of the bunch.

 

I had a similar experience with a fellow employees husband and there 3-4 year old son. Can't remember exact age jsut know he was a year or so younger than my eldest. He would tell his kid to "stop being gay" or "don't be a fag" just because the kid acted like a 3-4 year old and pouted or couldn't do something correctly. Now I am guilty of using the term "that is gay" from time to time but I do not belittle my children using these lines and I do believe in tough love sometimes.

[c-lo]

bickering removed from this thread. back on topic. carry on

[laff79]

 

Nice.

[KartRacerBoy]

Wish one my daughters friends had tough love parents. We aren't letting one of daughter's friends come to her sleepover 10th bday party. The girl has told me "no" before when I told her to stop doing something at a previous party. Last year, she was generally just a brat and none of the other girls liked her becz she was so mouthy. I really like her parents but they are doing a lousy job with this child.

[SCHM1AN]

I had a similar experience with a fellow employees husband and there 3-4 year old son. Can't remember exact age jsut know he was a year or so younger than my eldest. He would tell his kid to "stop being gay" or "don't be a fag" just because the kid acted like a 3-4 year old and pouted or couldn't do something correctly. Now I am guilty of using the term "that is gay" from time to time but I do not belittle my children using these lines and I do believe in tough love sometimes.

 

Heard a parent (in South Bend, sorry KRB) tell his 7 or 8 year old "stop acting like a retard". Aside from the fact that that word is sensitive to people who know somebody with a disability, that comment unnerved me because that child is going to grow up with such a tainted view on reality from his redneck parents.

[SurlyOldManMN]

I tried to teach my kid that the sun is a star last night after he brought home a paper plate craft project. Got some feedback such as: "the sun isn't a star, it's too big" and "how many suns are in the earth?". That was before I told him all the stuff we're made of came out of stars.

 

Me thinks there is a young mind about to be blown...

[05GT Guru]

Wish one my daughters friends had tough love parents. We aren't letting one of daughter's friends come to her sleepover 10th bday party. The girl has told me "no" before when I told her to stop doing something at a previous party. Last year, she was generally just a brat and none of the other girls liked her becz she was so mouthy. I really like her parents but they are doing a lousy job with this child.

 

I hear you, some of my friends have hinted that they believe I may have too much tough love or be too strict. Then they tell me how he can't stop his kid from screaming at him or laughing at him when he tells him no.

[SurlyOldManMN]

I hear you, some of my friends have hinted that they believe I may have too much tough love or be too strict. Then they tell me how he can't stop his kid from screaming at him or laughing at him when he tells him no.

 

Sounds like previous conversations between my wife and I.

[KartRacerBoy]

Never hit my daughter in her 10 years, but I would only hit a kid if they did something that might endanger themselves or others. That and my daughter just isn't one of those kids that challenge authority very much. I hope she grows out of that. I certainly did.

[05GT Guru]

Heard a parent (in South Bend, sorry KRB) tell his 7 or 8 year old "stop acting like a retard". Aside from the fact that that word is sensitive to people who know somebody with a disability, that comment unnerved me because that child is going to grow up with such a tainted view on reality from his redneck parents.

 

That is the reason I didn't appreciate the "stop being gay" comments. I rarely look who's toes I am stepping on and am not always PC nor do I try to be. It is because of the tainted view as you said this kid will now have... almost guaranteed.

[jasejase]

Took our 6 month old on our first overnight trip this past holiday weekend... Three nights in a strange new place, with a 4 hour drive to and from. Packing was a royal pain in the butt, however we didn't forget anything!

 

To top it all off... he had a virus with a 102 fever for most of the weekend.

 

With all that in mind, it went pretty darn good!

[PeterJMC]

I hear you, some of my friends have hinted that they believe I may have too much tough love or be too strict. Then they tell me how he can't stop his kid from screaming at him or laughing at him when he tells him no.

 

Are you consistent with discipline?

 

I feel as though some people confuse consistency with tough love or being too strict.

[SurlyOldManMN]

Never hit my daughter in her 10 years, but I would only hit a kid if they did something that might endanger themselves or others. That and my daughter just isn't one of those kids that challenge authority very much. I hope she grows out of that. I certainly did.

 

I swatted mine once when he was still in diapers. Indescribably acute feelings of horror, shame and failure immediately followed.

 

That said, I have no reservations about it if it really comes down to it. I somehow doubt it ever will. Thankfully he has a well enough developed sense of empathy and morality that it's usually not difficult to get the point across with blunt, brutally honest words and reasonable consequences.

[PeterJMC]

Took our 6 month old on our first overnight trip this past holiday weekend... Three nights in a strange new place, with a 4 hour drive to and from. Packing was a royal pain in the butt, however we didn't forget anything!

 

To top it all off... he had a virus with a 102 fever for most of the weekend.

 

With all that in mind, it went pretty darn good!

 

How did he handle the 4 hour drive? I think at 6 mo. old he spent most of it sleeping or feeding

[05GT Guru]

Are you consistent with discipline?

 

I feel as though some people confuse consistency with tough love or being too strict.

 

It is a easy thing to confuse. I would say yes and no for myself. I am quick to call my children out when they are getting out of line but I let them off easy sometimes just because they are so damn cute. That is why their mother contradicts herself, sometimes she tells me I am being to strict then it seems like 15 minutes late says to them "you got your daddy wrapped around your finger" when I let them off too easy in her eyes I guess.

[laff79]

I see both sides of the coin where I work. Kids that get hit too much and ones that don't get hit at all.

 

Life's all about balance.

[jasejase]

How did he handle the 4 hour drive? I think at 6 mo. old he spent most of it sleeping or feeding

 

That pretty much sums it up. Plus he was sick, so he zonked out. We stopped on the way down, woke him up, and fed him.

 

On the way back (he was feeling better at this point), we started crying when we were about 35 minutes from home... So we stopped and fed him.

 

We usually stop once for a snack/pee/gas on that trip anyways, so it didnt really change much for us.

[Ellesedil]

I tried to teach my kid that the sun is a star last night after he brought home a paper plate craft project. Got some feedback such as: "the sun isn't a star, it's too big" and "how many suns are in the earth?". That was before I told him all the stuff we're made of came out of stars.

 

Me thinks there is a young mind about to be blown...

 

If there's one topic of knowledge that I hope to impart onto my daughter (and future children), I hope it's science. The wife is an English major, so things could go either way.

[05GT Guru]

Keep em interested in science.... English is a dying language

[KartRacerBoy]

Heard a parent (in South Bend, sorry KRB) tell his 7 or 8 year old "stop acting like a retard". Aside from the fact that that word is sensitive to people who know somebody with a disability, that comment unnerved me because that child is going to grow up with such a tainted view on reality from his redneck parents.

 

We used to live in Elkhart, one county east of South Bend. Much less wealthy area. I got tired of going to the movies there since so many parents were short tempered and called their kids names for just being little kids. Hated that.

[SCHM1AN]

We used to live in Elkhart, one county east of South Bend. Much less wealthy area. I got tired of going to the movies there since so many parents were short tempered and called their kids names for just being little kids. Hated that.

 

Actually come to think of it, this incident happened in Roseland... go figure