Bored

[ChefRacer]

As the title says I'm bored......entertain me:bbq:

[ChefRacer]

Dammit, where is the entertainment? I'm almost bored enough with this forum to start trolling nasioc.

 

Where are the dancing girls or noobs, I need entertainment. I just finished watching this week's Archer episode so now I need other to be entertained more than ever.

[Magic Marker]

Netflix?

[ChefRacer]

Cancelled netflix, I felt like their whole online thing was FAIL

[mbshop]

sometimes for giggles i bang my head against the wall. ooooooo, pretty stars !

[ChefRacer]

Thats why you only have 21 posts

[ehsnils]

Dial random number and ask where the body you were supposed to pick up is.

[DeltaSniper]

http://maydaygarage.com/2012/02/17/maydaygarage-does-japan-day-two-part-1-of-2/

[LosAngelesLGT]

Cancelled netflix, I felt like their whole online thing was FAIL

 

Canceling netflix was the FAIL. Over 1000 films streamed and rated so far.

[ehsnils]

http://wonderfl.net/c/tNGi/fullscreen

[ehsnils]

This is from back in '86 so some of you weren't even born then.

 

 

Written By Shooting Shark.

Preface : Everyone's putting out these files, right? So, I thought I

might as well release one, since I generally like to write t-files.

Phone Stuff

 

 

• Call a sweep tone or similar obnoxious number, then call people at
  random with three-way.
  
• Call some hacker friends and tell them to call you back in an hour,
  because you think you're going to be busted. Forward your calls to
  the police department.
  
• Call Kentucky Fried Chicken and ask "Do you have extra crispy
  breasts?"
  
• Look up "Mary Stewart" or something in the phone book. Call this
  number and ask for Mary. If they say "she's not here", yell "Well
  where the hell IS that bitch?"
  
• Ask to use your neighbor's phone. Call 911 and put the phone down.
  Leave.
  

Sibling Meanness

 

 

• If you have at least two (younger) brothers or sisters, wait until
  they go to bed, then move them to each other's beds.
  
• If you have just one little brother or sister, put s/he in the
  bathtub.
  

Mall Shit

 

Drive down to your local mall and...

 

• Stroll into a Radio Shack. Walk up to a Color Computer and enter:
  10 CLS 20 FOR P = 1 TO 30000 : NEXT P 30 S = INT(255 * RND(1)) + 1 40 SOUND (S,50) RUN turn the volume ALL the way up (if the tv is hooked up to an amplifier, all the better) and leave the store...
  
• Go into a toy or hobby store and ask to demo a nice powerful
  remote-control car. Stand at the entrance of the hobby store and ram
  the car into shoppers.
  
• At the same store, play with one of those robots where whatever you
  say into the handset is echoed through the robot's speaker. Hide
  somewhere within the store and position the robot at the front of the
  store. Proposition women who walk by.
  
• Still at the mall, light off an M-80 and yell "Look out, he's got a
  gun!"
  
• Go up to some payfones. Place a collect call to the fone next to
  you.
  
• Go into a Fredrick's or other large lingerie store. Pretend you're
  looking for something to buy for your girlfriend. Pick up a pair of
  crotchless panties (or a similar item) and ask them to model it for
  you.
  
• Have them model stuff all night, or until they catch on that you're
  not going to buy anything.
  
• Bring a porno movie. Go into Video Concepts and play it on the 40"
  projection TV that's in front of the store.
  
• Go to Mrs. Field's Cookies, buy a dozen large, flat cookies. Go back
  to Video Concepts and put them in the CD players.
  
• Go to Macy's, or Emporium Capwells, etc. and knock the lingerie off
  the manequins. On the female mannequins that are completely dressed,
  open the blouses to the waists.
  
• Go to Brennan's or Matthew's and ask the salesmen if they know they
  have 200 watt amps hooked up to 100 watt capacity speakers.
  
• Bring some condoms (fresh or used) and casually drop them into
  shopper's bags. Or, leaving them on the floor is fine.
  
• Stand around a part of the mall where a lot of people walk by. Tell
  them "Your sock's untied."
  
• Go to the mall's pet store. Put powdered jello in the fish tanks.
  
• Go to B. Dalton or Waldenbooks. Pick up some issues of Penthouse.
  Relocate them among the children's books.
  
• Bring some crutches. Take off your shoe. Walk around with the
  crutches, keeping your leg stiff. Make someone think they bumped
  into you. Fall over and scream in pain.
  
• Go to the cutlery store and ask them if they have 4-foot ninja
  blades.
  
• Make up some signs that say "Please Use Other Door" and put them
  everywhere.
  
• Bring your own blank price tags and a pen...
  

Other Stuff

 

 

• Get or make some fake explosives (red tubes tied to an alarm clock,
  with some assorted wires sticking out, or a fake grenade will do) and
  drive down to a 7-11. Run into the store, say "Here, catch!" to the clerk.
  Throw them the fake bomb and run out of the store quickly.
  
• Go through the Burger King drive-through. Order about twenty dollars
  worth of Whoppers, Fries, Drinks, etc. When she says "will that be
  all for you?", say "oh yeah, I'd like some Chicken McNuggets,
  too...". When she says "I'm sorry, we don't have those..." etc, tell
  her to forget it and drive off.
  
• Get a suction dart gun. Shoot darts at your cat.
  
• Shoot darts at the TV.
  
• Get your dad's staple gun out of the garage. Take it down to Safeway
  and put staples in the bread.
  
• Put yellow dye in the swimming pool. Chocolate syrup is also
  interesting.
  
• Slap "KKK and Proud" bumber stickers on your niebhor's cars.
  
• If your neibhor has a "Le Car", pop a tire and write "Le Flat" above
  it.
  
• Grab a can of metallic purple spray paint and go at your neibhor's
  citrus tree.
  
• Go down to Main Street. Bring some chalk and draw sillouettes of
  bodies
  on the sidewalk. A little fake blood can be added for realism. Draw
  a sillouette of a gun.
  
• Buy some Wondra hand lotion (which is off-white) and put it on
  doorknobs, gas pump handles, etc.
  
• Walk to your local gas station late at night. Re-arrange the metal
  numbers on the price signs.
  
• Go to a church and rearrange the letters on the marquee. Remember
  that GOD anagrams into DOG. If there is a sign saying "Christmas
  Dinner" take out the "m".
  
• Make a water-based dye. Paint your dog polka-dotted. (Don't do this
  to your cat because he will lick off the dye and get very sick. Save
  this for your neibhor's cat.)
  
• Use a little bleach and give your dog some vertical stripes.
  
• Go out to the country and push cows over. (This is really fun.)
  
• Throw a rubber 4-square ball off a freeway overpass.
  

That's It!

 

[mr.hicksta]

A father buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it out at dinner one night.

 

The father asks his son what he did that day.

 

The son says, "I did some schoolwork." The robot slaps the son.

The son says, "Ok, Ok. I was at a friend's house watching movies."

 

Dad asks, "What movie did you watch?"

Son says, "Toy Story." The robot slaps the son. Son says, "Ok, Ok we were watching porn."

 

Dad says, "What? At your age I didn't even know what porn was!" The robot slaps the dad.

Mom laughs and says, "Well he certainly is your son!" The robot slaps the mom.

[mr.hicksta]

Here are some ideas to keep retirees occupied.

 

 

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out.

 

 

Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Target.

 

 

Dear Mrs. Samuel,

 

 

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Samuel, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

 

 

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

 

 

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

 

 

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

 

 

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares.. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

 

 

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

 

 

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

 

 

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

 

 

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.

 

 

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

 

 

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

 

 

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

 

 

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

 

 

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

 

 

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

 

 

And last, but not least:

 

 

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.

[mbshop]

wow, that many already ?

 

Thats why you only have 21 posts