whitetiger Posted July 24, 2007 Share Posted July 24, 2007 Since half of us are in some sort of IT field, this should be funny. >> >> > Tech support: What kind of computer do you have? >> >> > >> >> > Female customer: A white one... >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out. >> >> > Tech support: Have you tried pushing the Button? >> >> > Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck. >> >> > Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note. >> >> > Customer: No , wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's >> >> > still >> >> > on my desk... sorry.... >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the >> >> > screen. >> >> > Customer: Your left or my left? >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > Tech support: Good day. How may I help you? >> >> > Male customer: Hello... I can't print. >> >> > Tech support: Would you click on "start" for me and... >> >> > Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not >> >> > Bill >> >> > Gates. >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every >> >> > time I >> >> > try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and >> >> > placed >> >> > it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find >> >> > it... >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > ============== = >> >> > >> >> > Customer: I have problems printing in red... >> >> > Tech support: Do you have a color printer? >> >> > Customer: Aaaah....................thank you. >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am? >> >> > Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11. >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore. >> >> > Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer? >> >> > Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer. >> >> > Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back. >> >> > Customer: OK >> >> > Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you? >> >> > Customer: Yes >> >> > Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there >> >> > another >> >> > keyboard? >> >> > Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work... >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > Tech support: Your password is the small letter "a" as in apple, a >> >> > capital >> >> > letter V as n Victor, the number 7. >> >> > Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters? >> >> > >> >> > == ============= >> >> > >> >> > Customer: can't get on the Internet. >> >> > Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password? >> >> > Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it. >> >> > Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was? >> >> > Customer: Five stars. >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use? >> >> > Customer: Netscape. >> >> > Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program. >> >> > Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer. >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver >> >> > on my >> >> > computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears. >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > Tech support: How may I help you? >> >> > Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail. >> >> > Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem? >> >> > Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I >> >> > get the >> >> > circle around it? >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her >> >> > printer. >> >> > Tech support: Are you running it under windows? >> >> > Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. >> >> > The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his >> >> > printer is working fine." >> >> > >> >> > =============== >> >> > >> >> > And last but not least... >> >> > >> >> > Tech support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at >> >> > the >> >> > same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. >> >> > Now type >> >> > the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager." >> >> > Customer: I don't have a P. >> >> > Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob. >> >> > Customer: What do you mean? >> >> > Tech support: "P".....on your keyboard, Bob. >> >> > >> >> > Customer: I'M NOT >> >> > GOING TO >> >> > DO THAT! >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > >> >> >> >> >> >> >> > >> > >> > >> >> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meier motor sports Posted July 24, 2007 Share Posted July 24, 2007 hahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gianspi Posted July 24, 2007 Share Posted July 24, 2007 Wow this brings back bad memories of when I used to deal with the customers. enough zip ties and duct tape will fix anything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
700watts Posted July 24, 2007 Share Posted July 24, 2007 AHHHH the memories!!!! :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fizxman Posted July 25, 2007 Share Posted July 25, 2007 Ah, customers! I sold Apple computers once upon a time and had a customer return one to the store because "it has too many buttons." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bosco Posted July 26, 2007 Share Posted July 26, 2007 i feel their pain. bosco Stay Stock Stay Happy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robinlsb Posted July 26, 2007 Share Posted July 26, 2007 A very old one for you ancients. "The system won't read the disk!" "Did you put the disk in?" "Yes!" "Did you close the door?" "Hold on." Sound of office door closing! "Belief does not make truth. Evidence makes truth. And belief does not make evidence." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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