BENCOB Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs073/1101762799577/img/6.gif?a=1102487191744 FORD MUSTANGS 1-2 AT HOUSTON: DETROIT SAVED Angleton TX--In a shocking development certain to boost Detroit's fortunes, '80s-era Mustangs have finished first and second at LeMons Gator-O-Rama outside Houston, Texas. Ford Motor Company shares rose 29% on the news. Roach-clip and meth futures also showed sizable gains. Based on the same street technology favored by deadbeat dads worldwide, the winnning Mustangs employed race-modified hardware such as a toilet seat, a clothesline-controlled airbrake, and ex-Pinto drivetrain components to give Ford its first major motorsports victory since Steve McQueen's pantsing in LeMans. While technically privateers, the first-place Formula M for Mullet and runnerup Shake & Bake 4-Cylinder Mustang Mafia teams' "Win-on-Sunday, Shitcan-on-Monday" philosophy smelled of official Ford practice. In handing Dearborn its much-needed PR bonanza, the dual Mustangs vanquished world-class opponents including a '78 Toyota HiLux with a skateboard ramp in its bed; the Opel GT of Team Israel (official slogan: "No Fat Shiksas"); and an Alfa Milano that lasted no longer than a bag of its namesake comestibles when locked in a room with Al Gore. Also appearing on the grid were some 4,823 e30 BMWs, the largest collection of beat-ass 280ZXs since Santana's last Day On the Green, and an Acura Integra whose diff case is still in the weeds near Turn Six. To see more on Gator-O-Rama '09 and/or imperil your job with continued time-wasting web surfing, check out the linked junk below: Race Stuff... Gator '09 Event Pix from LeMons FacebookSkippy, the Amazing Flying IntegraIn-Car Compilation from Team Unintended AccelerationFinal Results Coverage by the Liberal Media Elite... JalopnikHouston ChronicleThe HoustonistSpeed:Sport:Life's bits on Punishments and the Race Penalty & Pit Favorites... Preach to the Converted PenaltyMarcel Marceau Penalty People's CurseSashimi Tabernacle Choir Volvo Jay Lamm, Chief Perpetrator 24 HOURS OF LeMONS 5675 Horton Street, Suite C Emeryville CA 94608 510.655.5980 x23 (Jay direct) email@example.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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